First of all, I'd like to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Michelle, of Michelles Lounge, if you havent been there yet, then get there!! www.geocities.com/tamantha

Heres a song for you

MAY YOU LIVE 10,000 YEARS

AND DRINK 10,000 BEERS

GET PLASTERED YOU BASTARD,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

Anyhoo onto the raving

______________________________

I had to work today. *sob*

In a bag shop, at the morisset mega markets, for those of you who don't know, the MMM is a huuuuuuuuuuuge building (hence the MEGA in Mega market) that has lotsa stalls (hence the MARKET in Mega Market) (mostly run by the same people, selling the same stuff, just in a different positions around the market)With lotsa parking, and very little patrionage.

Needless to say, today was very slow.

Allow me to define slow, I made my first sale at 11:00. (we open at 8:30)

That. my friends. is slow.

For those thinking of going into retail, be prepared for this:SCENE 1

"ME: Hello Can I help you?"

"CUSTOMER: Yes I'm looking for a bag"

"ME: Well, heres a spot of luck, your in a bag store! What sort of bag"

"CUSTOMER: "I Don't want a big bag, but i don't want a small one either."

"ME: (to self:hmmmm....you're one of those types are you..grrrrrr)Outloud: Um, lets work on colour and design shall we, Leather or Vinyl"

"CUSTOMER: ooh i'd love leather...."

ME: "great! leather is ov...."

CUSTOMER: But I can't afford it, so vinyl"

ME:"GRRRRR"

CUSTOMER: "Pardon"

ME: " Indigestion......."

OR THIS:SCENE 2

ME: "Hello there Can i help you?"

CUSTOMER: "NO."

ME:"oooooooookey then.... I'll just sodd off."

SCENE 3

ME: "Can I help you"

CUSTOMER:(picking bag up off the $20 rack) " How much is this bag"

ME:(GRRRRRR)"Well considering its on the $20 rack, I'll hazard a guess and say $20!"

CUSTOMER:" Can i get if for less"

ME:" (GRRRRRR)

WHAT I SAY AND WHAT I MEAN:

HELLO CAN I HELP YOU = What the F#@K do you want!

THAT COLOUR IS FANTASTIC ON YOU = Please just buy the sodding bag and sodd off so i can eat.

THAT BAG IS REALLY REALLY POPULAR = it came in 5 years ago, and we hope to sell out of the first load of stock soon.

WHAT TO EXPECT

1. working in a market, you don't get much time for lunch, the 5 minutes it takes to get lunch in the quietest part of the day, will turn into the peak hour rush as soon as you leave.

2. The fact that you've sold nothing all morning means, that your next 10 customers will come when you sit down to take the first bite of your beautiful hot donar kabab with all the trimmings.

3. When you tell a customer to just look at the pricetage, the price won't be on the tag, having stated that, you will know all the prices of everybag, except the ones without the pricetag on them.

So I hope I have enlightened you all.

Pity me, I must do this again tomorrow.

Comments!!